The Gift of Love – Compatible Relationships
Love is more often than not, misunderstood. Many people think that love means “I care about you” in the classic sense of the word — that is, if someone was really “loving” to you, they would be treating you well. In fact, love is so much more than this. It is an ever evolving, never-ending quality in people, relationships, and their world. When we think of love, we usually think of love as a gift, a devotion, a caring attitude, or even a monetary investment.
Love encompasses a whole range of positive and even negative emotional and psychological states, from the deepest romantic love, the strongest interpersonal bond, to the easiest pure joy. Although love itself can vary by individual to individual, there are some common, important, emotions that every one experiences when falling in love. These are: intimacy, attraction, commitment, trust, safety, sharing, and passion. Intimacy is the physical feeling that your partner gives to you, such as closeness, cuddling, kissing, holding hands, or even more intimate contact. It is the familiarity shared between two people; however, unlike love which is a profound internal experience, intimacy is usually defined by the mutual sharing of thoughts, ideas, and emotions between two people.
Attraction is the emotion of being drawn to someone or something. These may be true loves, casual friendships, or even sexual attractions. This emotion can lead to feelings of love for one another, but it is also accompanied by other more superficial ones — wanting to spend time with each other, liking the same things, being drawn to the same people, etc. People fall in love with one another through a process that involves the conscious and subconscious exchange of various types of information, such as what the other person likes and dislikes, where they live, what their career goals are, how attractive they are, etc. The attraction process can take many forms, but it generally involves feelings of desire, a desire to be with this person, and often, an attraction that is based purely on looks.
Compatibility is the study of compatible personalities and emotions — what I call’real love.’ True love is a unique emotional union involving two people who have similar personalities and beliefs. Real love is different from lust or love because it is not based on superficial or transient factors such as appearance, but involves genuine and enduring qualities. Compatibility is the primary means by which two people develop and express real love.
Friendship is the intimate and frequent sharing of deep, meaningful emotions, such as friendship, care, and affection. As well, this can be a very satisfying way to build relationships. Friendship is a much larger concept that encompasses a variety of human relationships and their development. Friendship is most often described in terms of emotional connection, but it can also involve the elements of loyalty, trust, respect, and support. This includes a person’s ability to feel the needs and desires of another, and his ability to reciprocate those needs and desires.
A growing relationship can be enhanced through conscious effort to learn appropriate behaviors for building and maintaining a positive relationship. A positive relationship is one in which two people are open and honest with each other, and in which both people openly communicate their thoughts, feelings, and desires. These relationships involve mutual respect, kindness, respect, generosity, understanding, tenderness, and commitment. Healthy, fulfilling relationships offer individuals the ability to develop and expand their individual lifestyles, and provide fulfillment in life and in love. When building positive emotions in your life, you must keep in mind that in order to experience these wonderful feelings, you must first develop and live in healthy relationships.
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